To openly admit that you enjoy being the benefits of solitude can often turn into an invitation to opinions and misconceptions about being alone. You are often met with endless questions and suggestions on how to avoid being alone. Being in solitude is often confused with loneliness.
When I listen to opinions about how lonely you can be when you are alone, I am often reminded of days when I would experience loneliness while I had company and wished I had remained alone. I am also reminded that some of the most beautiful moments of my life were in solitude and surrounded by silence.
This, in no way, takes away our need as human beings for connection. We are wired for connection and it is a need we cannot take away. In the same space, we also need a connection with ourselves, one where we are not interrupted by external influence.
Moments of solitude have never led me into a state of loneliness. This has encouraged me to make a deliberate choice to spend some quality time alone. I have found these moments to be peaceful and empowering. I will share some of the lessons I have learned in solitude.
Being alone teaches one to make decisions out of an understanding of being good enough. The choices you make are fueled by a sense of knowing that you are good enough and lack nothing. Sometimes we choose out of desperation because we do not believe that we are good enough and worthy. Being alone will change this mindset.
Being alone has taught me a great deal in appreciating that who I am, what I have, and where I am is good enough. This is in no way to prevent oneself from growth and change. It’s important to understand that change and growth can be channeled from a mindset of sufficiency rather than lack.
Sometimes we seek an understanding of some of life’s challenging circumstances that occur and find ourselves with no clue as to why things turned out the way they did. I often found answers in moments of solitude. This is where you sometimes realize that what may have ended and offered no great understanding at that particular moment might have been the Universal’s way of protecting you.
So much gets done when you are alone because you are not negotiating or trying to accommodate everyone’s demands. Alone time offers no room for distraction because you are also not compromising on your time and commitments. Without anyone interrupting your thoughts, you can dig deep within yourself for some creative ideas and execute them. You make decisions with a lot more clarity and this can be very beneficial towards productivity. Read more on productivity tips.
Compassion, empathy, and patience
When it comes to truly understanding and taking care of our emotional well-being, alone time is the perfect time for it. Sometimes we experience difficult emotions that require our own space and isolation to nurture and take care of. I discovered that treating your own emotions as a nuisance rather than tendering to them always comes back to haunt you in different ways in life. And this has been one greatest lessons, to offer full awareness and presence to emotional needs. As you begin to care for your own emotions, you also can show compassion and empathy to the emotional well-being of others.
I often call it the court of concern where I give myself time to ask myself some really difficult questions and observe my behavior. This is where you sit yourself down, question the roles you are playing in certain situations. You also find out where you are lacking or going wrong, find out how you may be preventing yourself from achieving your goals, and also find ways to correct your behavior.
Whenever you can, set aside time to be by yourself and enjoy even more benefits of solitude.